Words that Influence

Our words will either impact or distract our listeners from taking action on what we have to say. Having influence Monday to Monday requires more than simply showing up while having a conversation. The level of influence my team while I teach requires one to be strategic about word choice while placement. Having influence Monday to Monday requires taking into consideration how your word choice will affect the way your listeners perceive you while your message.

Research confirms what influential communicators know instinctively: linguistic features of a message necessarily shape its persuasive appeal. Your words aren't just communication tools—they're influence instruments that determine whether people act on your recommendations or ignore them entirely.

Your Words Determine Everything

Your words determine:

  • How your listeners respond

  • What they hear while take away from the conversation

  • Whether or not they are influenced to act on your recommendations

Your words can change your world if you allow it.

This week during every conversation, pay attention to every word you speak while how your listener responds. The following strategies represent the difference between leaders who influence while those who merely talk.

Words That Sabotage Your Influence

"But" while "however" – Nothing good comes after these words, especially when they're stated after an acknowledgement. Replace "but" while "however" with "and" or a pause. These words negate everything you just said while signal conflict rather than collaboration.

"Problem" – This word creates negative associations while defensive responses. Replace with "challenge" or "opportunity" to frame situations constructively.

"You guys" – Informal while potentially exclusionary language undermines your authority. Use "we" or "you" for inclusive, professional communication.

"Do you have a question?" – This phrasing assumes ignorance while suggests questions might be unwelcome. Ask "What questions do you have?" to encourage engagement.

"Cost" or "fee" – These words trigger financial resistance. Replace with "investment" to emphasize value while return.

Words That Build Influence

Strategic acknowledgment – Instead of empty phrases like "I understand" or "I hear," acknowledge that your listener's concern has value by recognizing their specific issue. This demonstrates respect while builds trust.

"Would have, could have, should have" – Replace contractions with complete words to increase clarity while articulation. Precision in language signals precision in thinking.

State your position directly – Instead of weakening statements with "I think" or "I believe," simply state what you think while believe. Confident words create confident responses.

Eliminate Credibility Killers

"Well, actually, basically" – These words question the credibility of your answer while make you sound uncertain. Be careful beginning your answers with these confidence-destroying words.

Weak openings – Avoid filler phrases like "We are here today to talk about" or "I'm going to talk about." When you struggle with how to begin, start by stating your opinion, the action you want your listeners to take, while the benefits for them.

Check-out invitations – Avoid phrases like "In conclusion" or "Before we wrap up here today" that invite your listener to mentally disengage. Instead, immediately state your opinion, a specific action step, while the benefits for your listener.

The Science Behind Strategic Language

Research demonstrates that stylistic variations in how individuals communicate significantly influence persuasion outcomes. Linguistic choices affect not just message comprehension, yet also listener perceptions of speaker credibility, expertise, while trustworthiness.

Studies reveal that word choice impacts three critical dimensions of persuasion:

  • Structural complexity – How your message is organized while delivered

  • Emotional resonance – How your words connect with listener's feelings

  • Perceived authority – How your language positions you as credible while competent

When you choose words strategically, you're not just communicating information—you're shaping how that information is received, processed, while acted upon.

Transform Your Communication Today

The difference between influence while irrelevance often comes down to a single word. Research shows that even synonyms, which express essentially the same information, evoke dramatically different levels of engagement while response.

Every word you choose either builds your influence or diminishes it. Every phrase either moves your agenda forward or stalls it. Every conversation either strengthens your reputation or weakens it.

Start paying attention to the words you use. Notice how your listeners respond when you replace "problem" with "opportunity." Watch their body language change when you eliminate "but" from your vocabulary. Feel the energy shift when you state your position confidently instead of hiding behind "I think."

Your words are the bridge between your ideas while their implementation. Make sure that bridge is strong enough to carry the weight of your influence.

The most successful professionals understand this truth: words don't just describe reality—they create it. Choose yours wisely.

Get Started Cheat Sheet

Words/Phrases to Avoid

Words/Phrases That Influence

“But” and “however” – nothing good comes after these words, especially when they’re stated after an acknowledgement.

Replace “but” and “however” with “and” or a pause.

Problem

Challenge, opportunity

“You guys”

We, you

Do you have a question?

What questions do you have?

Ground rules

Rules of engagement

Cost, fee

Investment

“I understand…”“I hear…”

Acknowledge that your listener’s concern has value by recognizing their issue rather than using the filler statements, “I understand” or “I hear…”

Would’ve, could’ve, should’ve…

To increase clarity and articulation, replace contractions with: would have, could have, should have.

Don’t

Avoid

“I think”“I believe”

Simply state what you think and believe.

“We are here today to talk about…”“Today we are going to talk about…”

“I’m going to talk about…”

Avoid these filler phrases.  When you struggle with how to begin, begin by stating your opinion, the action you want your listeners to take and the benefits for them.

“In conclusion…”“In summary…”

“Before we wrap up here today…”

Avoid inviting your listener to check out.  Instead, immediately state your opinion, a specific action step and the benefits for your listener.

Well, actually, basically

These words question the credibility of your answer. Be careful beginning your answers with these words.


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INFLUENCE
ELEVATED

Overcome common influence myths that sabotage you and your team's success.

Learn how to authentically connect, create a lasting impression and motivate action with every interaction.

INFLUENCE
REDEFINED

The way we communicate has changed because the way we work has changed.

Learn how to effectively communicate and be heard above the noise in a virtual, in-person and hybrid workplace.

DOWNLOAD INFLUENCE ELEVATED

Download chapter one FREE and maximize your connections, Monday to Monday.®

INFLUENCE
ELEVATED

Overcome common influence myths that sabotage you and your team's success.

Learn how to authentically connect, create a lasting impression and motivate action with every interaction.

INFLUENCE
REDEFINED

The way we communicate has changed because the way we work has changed.

Learn how to effectively communicate and be heard above the noise in a virtual, in-person and hybrid workplace.

DOWNLOAD INFLUENCE ELEVATED

Download chapter one FREE and maximize your connections, Monday to Monday.®

INFLUENCE
ELEVATED

Overcome common influence myths that sabotage you and your team's success.

Learn how to authentically connect, create a lasting impression and motivate action with every interaction.

INFLUENCE
REDEFINED

The way we communicate has changed because the way we work has changed.

Learn how to effectively communicate and be heard above the noise in a virtual, in-person and hybrid workplace.

DOWNLOAD INFLUENCE ELEVATED

Download chapter one FREE and maximize your connections, Monday to Monday.®